Today was good.
I woke up at 8, had breakfast in
the hostel lobby and headed to Queen Elizabeth Market (I think that’s what it’s
called) which is a huge outdoor market—two city blocks! I was there for about
two hours and had to hold myself back from buying heaps of stuff. The fresh
produce they had was pretty incredible, too. Alison Jenkins talked me down from
wanting to buy a $400 knife set. Thanks Alison.
Then I went to the Melbourne Aquarium. It was good. It was bigger than Sydney's and had better critters--except for sharks. Sydney had better sharks. After that I went to the Crown Entertainment Complex and realized I was in WAY over my head. I don't need to own anything by Guess or Hugo Boss or whoever. So I went to the casino, went to the most expensive roulette table, and watched people throw away thousands of dollars for nearly two hours. I then grabbed some sushi and ran up to Eureka Sky Deck--88 floors up. It's the tallest viewing platform in the southern hemisphere. But I liked Sydney's "Sydney Tower" better. Then was the Victoria National Gallery. That was good stuff. Now I'm back in my hostel preparing for a night out.
Tomorrow I'll post pictures from my Melbourne Adventures and maybe some more details (I'm running a little short on time at the moment). But for now, here's the six people you'll meet in every hostel.
Last night I wrote this. Hope you enjoy.
The Six People You
Will Meet in a Hostel
1)
The Quiet Asian Guy: Let’s face it, with the world’s highest
population being Asian, statistically, you will see this guy just about
everywhere. The Quiet Asian Guy can be young or old; it does not matter.
However, it seems that Quiet Asian Guy is often a middle aged man, usually traveling
alone. Quiet Asian Man will say very little; he is eerily quiet. Even if you
attempt to communicate with Quiet Asian Man, he will politely say the fewest
words necessary, smile, and return to his
book/magazine/iPad/iPhone/computer/technological device. Quiet Asian Man also
sleeps an amazing amount. He has an uncanny ability to sleep with the lights on
and/or fully clothed and/or on top of his blankets. He also tends to go to bed
early, even as early as 8 or 9 o’clock. Even though Quiet Asian Man may go to
bed at an obscenely early hour, this does not necessarily mean he will rise
early. However, if he does rise early, he will leave with ghost-like silence
(some may say he possesses “ninja-like” skill). Although Quiet Asian Man may
not keep you company or ask you “what’s wrong?” or “what did you do today?” he
is a steady, polite, quiet, and respectful roommate.
2) British Girl:
British girl is a barrel of fun in any situation. She is outgoing and
will introduce herself. She is not afraid of confrontation or speaking her
mind. Usually between the ages of 18 and 22, British Girl is not always the
most attractive girl, but has an
irresistible charm to her (perhaps residing in the accent). British Girl will
invite you to join a drinking game, smash down more drinks than you can count,
and leave you staggering in the dust as she dodges traffic at lightning speed
on her way to the club where she knows the most boys will buy her drinks.
Although sometimes a loose cannon, British Girl is always entertaining, up for
a good time, and an overall good mate to keep around.
3)
Happy Foreign Guy: Happy Foreign Guy has an incredibly obvious
love for life evident from his wild eyes, to his goofy smile, to his very, very
loud voice. He is a Type A personality on steroids. Happy Foreign Guy will talk
your ear off and always has a new set of questions to ask you about your
travels, your family, your favorite food, etc. He can often be compared to a
Labrador puppy and can range from the age of early to late twenties and
sometimes even into the early thirties. Happy foreign guy enjoys going out and
having drinks. Unfortunately, the more drinks Happy Foreign Guy consumes, the
louder his already loud and voice becomes and the more outstanding his already
outstanding personality becomes. Happy Foreign Guy tends to be from Spanish or
Middle Eastern country. Although Happy Foreign Guy will always give you the
time of day and always be ready for a good conversation (or even a bad one for
that matter), he tends to push the envelope and, at times, become “too much.”
4)
Beautiful European Girl: Simply stated, Beautiful European Girl is all of
the above. She is gorgeous. She is European (and it doesn’t matter where from
because, frankly, you don’t care). And she is most definitely a woman. Often a
cigarette smoker, Beautiful European Girl will make a filthy habit look good and, even
if you don’t have a cigarette to offer, you hope and pray for her to look your way
and ask, in whatever accent she may possess, “Do you have cigarette?” Beautiful European Girl can range from 18 to late 20s and always has an impeccable sense
of style. She can be either quiet and mysterious, or loud and outgoing, but in
the end, it just doesn’t matter—she’s THAT good looking. Whether Hot European
Girl is a great roommate, or the hostel’s worst nightmare, it simply doesn’t
matter, she is a staple of the hostel scene and will always be accepted in some
form or another.
5)
Guitar Guy:
Inexplicably, Guitar Guy has followed you through nearly every stage of
life. When you were young, Guitar Guy was the kid who received his first guitar
for his eighth birthday and from then on, always had more friends (or at least
people around him). In high school, Guitar Guy was the one sitting on a bench
in the hallway, or in the cafeteria, or outside the school, or under a tree in
the courtyard, playing his mellow tunes and attracting the ladies. Amazingly, Guitar
Guy used the exact same tricks in college and even more amazingly, they still
worked. In the corporate world, Guitar Guy always made sure he dropped a line
here and there about “his band” or “his axe” or “this one gig I played.” And
yes, Guitar Guy has followed you to the hostel, sitting in the lobby or common
room with one or more groupies listening to his melodic tones and trading
musical chops. It’s not that Guitar Guy is necessarily a bad roommate, it’s
just that, if you’re not intensely drawn to his musical ability as if a spell
has been cast on you, it is highly likely that you will find Guitar Guy and his
old tricks, hugely annoying.
6)
Looking for Work Guy: Looking for Work Guy is a nomad and not
native to the country in which he is residing. He will tell you that he had a
job in the last city he was in, but no longer has the position for any number
of reasons. It is reasonably safe to assume that he (or she) really did have a
job at some point, or else, how else would they have money to pay for their
room? Looking for Work Guy never seems to do much. He leaves in the morning and
comes back at night, but never seems to have made any progress in his hunt for
work and always seems to have an excuse for why he doesn’t have a job. He has
become very good at living out of his suitcase or backpack and making the
hostel his home. Looking for Work Guy is not a bad roommate, but he brings
little to the table.
7)
Gap Year:
Gap Year can be a male or female and has simply taken the year off to
“see the world,” aka “party a lot.” Gap Year always seems to have more money
than they can spend and is always flush with alcohol and keen for a good time,
regardless of the time, place, or circumstance. Gap Year is almost always
young, usually 18 or 19, and rather reckless, ignorant, and irresponsible. The
positive to Gap Year is that they are often times a native to the land you find
yourself in and can act as a helpful guide. Gap Year can be a helpful adversary
or a terrible nuisance.
Cheers guys, I'll post again tomorrow with photos and fun stuff
~Daniel
